Wisdom, my Ass

Hey People, sorry I haven't written in (insert time period) because of (insert increasingly lame excuse about stressful real life). Well, that's the gist of it, anyway, because after work, I get tied up in uni work, and after that, I barely have the time for the base tasks of "eat", "sleep" "brush teeth", and "change underwear", so I just decided to skip the "have fun" part of my weekly schedule entirely. And then it suddenly became November.

My body doesn't seem to find this all too funny, however, and given me subtle hints about his displeasure all summer. Athlete's Foot, at first. I have stuff that cures that, never mind. Then, gaining ten pounds of weight. Would be uncomfortable, if you don't count in the fact that even with them, I'm still ten pounds below the recommended weight for my height, so that one's actually working in my favor. For the first time in ages, I could actually buy pants fitting me - well, if I had the time to shop, that is. Body recognizes he's not getting anywhere, and starts popping zits, about one per day and facial region. Girl, please. I've been having zits since two days before my twelfth birthday. And unlike my puberty, I'm not a sobbing case of hormones anymore, thank god. So I'm able to shrug it off, because I'm not that vain. Then, hair loss. Oooh, subtle, and actually getting my attention - because while I might not care for my average facial structure, I do have a weak spot of vanity regarding my hair - mainly since I still, at age 28, have kind of a boyish appearance, sorta Michael J. Fox-like, and I would look really reaaaally stupid with male-pattern baldness. But I think I'll just look into Propecia and the like in the future and move on.

So, it became clear for my body that, if he finally wants me to slow down a notch, he inevitably has to break out the heavy artillery. That heavy artillery means: Teeth. I have a major phobia for dentists, so yeah. nothing short of my eyeballs literally bursting into flame will have any more impact.
Week 1. It started out as a dull pressure between my front teeth. Which I dismissed. I already knew the last wisdom tooth was coming, and well, I have had three of them already, all of which went out without any bigger fuss. Let him come, I have place for one more.

Week 2.The pressure continues. Well. Speed up, your buddies are waiting. And I'm busy redesigning the cover sheets of my TPS reports or something.

Week 3.The pressure intensifies, and shortens my sleep phases. Hurry up, fucknugget, I'm busy.

Week 4. I give in and make an appointment with my dentist, because, well, I don't sleep any longer. Are there any other people with moderate to severe oral phobia out there? Then you might be able to understand what "making an appointment with dentist", out of free will, means to me.

My dentist is a nice man, but he tends to be a little too enthusiastic about my teeth, or rather, their problems.

T: I have a problem with my wisdom tooth.
The Dentist takes that scraping thing and ventures into my unwilling mouth. Both me and the assistant tense up, me because I don't like people venturing into my oral cavity in general, and her because she knows, from experience, that I will plant my fist into her stomach to vocalise eventual...err...displeasures with the treatment. (I apologized. But I would do it again, without remorse.)
D: Yes, that one down there looks like a pretty case of caries.
T: Err...actually I mean the one on the upper side. The one that's not out yet? (But thanks about the prospect of a drill in the very deepest part of my jaw bone in a future appointment.)
D: (after an x-ray) Well, it seems that your tooth is special.
T: "Special" means you apply a special spray, and it vanishes on its own?
D: Oh no. See, here (points to the x-ray) you see the tooth reaching into your nasal cavity. Also, on the side, you can even see it boring into the back of your jaw muscle tissue - that's what's probably causing the pain. I can't remove that, you get to see a colleague of mine, a facial surgeon.
T: *twitch*

Facial surgery. Oh Goody. But since the pain in my jaw went from "ouch" to "Fucking OW!" to "OH PLEASE LORD HAVE MERCY" in the two days between dentist and facial surgeon, I didn't complain. Mostly because I was so exhausted from sleep deprivation that my mother had to physically drag me out of the house and into the car.
Oh, and what I definitely don't need in this kind of situation is walking into the waiting room and hearing an earthshattering "EEAAAAAOOOUUWWWW!!!" from a fellow patient. If I had been in a better condition, I'd've cut my losses and run screaming into the night.

The tooth removal itself wasn't that bad, because, thank the heavens for regional anaesthetics. And also, after the tooth was out, and the pressure gone, I was so very merry...until the drugs went off, that is. Since the tooth went up all the way to the nasal cavity, this also meant in the first two days I had to be really careful not to sneeze or anything, because certain parts of my anatomy in mouth and nose then flabbed. Also, when my mouth is closed, I really REALLY shouldn't be able to draw air into my mouth through my nose. Aren't you glad I imparted that interesting and disgusting wisdom upon you just now?

And yes, instead of finally taking a much-needed sick day, I purposefully set the appointment to a friday when I'm not working, and went on to work back on Monday. Probably because I'm just that much of a masochistic moron.

Yeah, and this is pretty much everything I remember from Autumn 2008. People say admitting that you have a problem is the first step and shit. I so admit my problem, too many activities crammed into too little time slots. There. Could now somebody get on with the fixing of said problem? I mean, I would solve it myself, but, just look at the time! Too late, too late, too-late-too-late-too-late!!! *hops onwards towards the next useless appointment while Lewis Carroll rolls his eyes in the background*

Join Teshik when he gets all he wishes, in the worst possible way of course, during Christmas and January. Which he will probably post in November 2012, by the rate things are going.