Teshik's Blog: the series of tubes

Showing posts with label the series of tubes. Show all posts

Monday, June 23, 2008

Fun for the Masses

Hey You! Yes, I mean you! Are you currently underworked? Maybe out of gainful employment? Are you even bored out of your MIND? Do you need a cheap, nay, free pastime to spend the endless hours? Despair no more, because those Interwebs of late (which are, as you all know, a series of tubes) have countless pages of made-up-shit just for that very purpose.

Plus, as an added bonus: You just know that some other person spent countless hours behind this, just to entertain the world.

Section I: Video Entertainment.

You all know Youtube. For those who don't: Dear Sir or Madam, are you aware that, at this moment, you have a real mouse on your desk, and are probably even touching it? Go find pest control.
Sorry. But you just can take so many calls from friends and family ("Hey, I just bought me the internets, and now it won't work." Or: "I can't access my Email." - "That's because you're on the eBay website." - "Yeah, but I can't open my Email! Duh!") before you start getting mean to the Technophobes.

Innyway. Youtube basically is one of those Gold-digging sites: You search for the nuggets, while digging through the 90 % utter crap that comprises the rest. One of thee nuggets:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uk2sPl_Z7ZU
How to draw the Mona Lisa with MS Paint. Just...wow.

Or: Fun-ucationals: Trying to remember the Presidents of the USA? All 50 States and their Capitals? Or even just all countries in the whole friggin' world? The animaniacs have the answer:

Presidents:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vvy0wRLD5s8

States:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sNUDDaEOvuY

Nations:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IDtdQ8bTvRc

Also, if you just want a random quick flashback into the nineties? Here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjOePNFRFRU
(You can also watch the original, but why? It doesn't even have dancing hippos.)

Then: Abridged Series. These are Youtube-"Shorts" (usually five to ten minutes), retelling an episode of a selected anime or cartoon. And when I say "retell", I mean "parody", pointing out the various plotholes, inconsistencies, and make just plain old fun. In most cases, having seen the original cartoon? is entirely optional. Warning: All of them contain coarse language, some adult content, and, like, you're spoiled afterwards, DUH!
Of course, there are also about a million copycats of the good ones, most of them atrociously bad. Some of the good ones are:

Yugioh The Abridged Series
by LittleKuriboh, The guy who I think started it all. Has now started his own website hosting the stuff.

Avatar TAS
"Hold on, I'll save us by freezing us in a giant block of ice! Yeah, best plan ever." Heh.

Teen Titans TAS
Not that impressive the first minute or so, but give it a shot, it really pays off. There are other series around, I didn't watch them yet, only Chaltab's.

Yu Yu Hakusho TAS
The anime is of the more obscure variety, but the humor's still good.

Legend of Zelda - TAS
The game, in abridged format.

Sailor Moon AbridgedHeh. The best part is, it really brings out the extreme cheesiness of the original. Now with it's own website, too.

Secret of Mana Theater- Not a movie, per se, but a flash-made retelling of Secret of Mana, the SNES video game. This one's the funniest once you've played the game though (look for emulators.)

And while we're on the topic of flash - an entire world of flash games and little movies, over here, at Newgrounds.

Section II - Games

You need something more interactive to keep yourself occupied? No problem. For the internet also supplies oodles of Games, too. And, like the previous stuff: for free.

Just tossing out some examples, because I don't have the time to find all of them at the moment:

Survival Guide: Dust Settles

You just happened to survive the nuclear war. Now, onwards to becoming on of the post-apocalyptic World leaders! A browser game. If you like strategy, here's your genre. If you want pretty explosions and stuff, not so much.
Space4k

Browser game just as above, but this time, you're ruling space.
Anarchy Online

One of the "real environment" games. Instead of browser games, you download a game client (yes, it's biiiig. I suggest Bittorent), and log on to a 3D environment, where you can create a character fighting monsters, and other players. and stuff. Imagine the Sims. Only with guns. And dinosaurs.

Section III - Webcomics

The third, and largest section, mainly because I'm not in the mood to sort the good from the bad, so you'll just get a dump from my Favorites folder, and you'll figure it out. Hey, you're the people with nothing to do at the moment...

arcade(Gamers Fun)

:: Dueling Analogs ::: Dueling Analogs is a color semi-weekly webcomic that lampoons the characters, culture and subtext of modern gaming and video game culture. Updates every Tuesday and Thursday.
Ctrl+Alt+Del - Tragically l337
GOD MODE * Mon-Wed-Fri * Gaming Comics Hilarity by Ryan Kerns: For fans of Manga, Anime, Games, Gaming, Gamers Playstation, Nintendo, Xbox, Halo 2, PSP, Sony, Squaresoft, Nintendogs, Sonic, Final Fantasy, Advent Children, Nintendo Revolution, PS3, XBOX 360
STAGE SELECT: When Masters Attack - Updated every Friday and Monday!: A megaman webcomic! HAND DRAWN! Bye bye, sprite comics!
VG Cats - Updated Mondays
EXTRALIFE - Web comic for geeks, gamers, and stuff like that
Penny Arcade!
SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby: For fans of Manga, Anime, Games, Gaming, Gamers, Playstation, Nintendo, Xbox, Halo 2, PSP, Sony, Warcraft, Super Mario Bros.
Press Start To Play - A Webcomic About Life, Love And Videogames. Updated Monday and Friday
ActionTrip Comic Strip: Taking Public Relations to New Heights: ActionTrip.com offers a great collection of gaming comics, alternative comic strips, world of arcraft comics, funny humor, and more!
Digital Unrest - Updated at least every Monday
Bob and George, the Comic Strip! - Discontinued, but it ran for seven years. One of the then-popular sprite comics.

Sinfest
Spells & Whistles: A Comic by Tauhid Bondia and Mike Spectre
Swordwaltzer
The Adventures of John Witchthorn ™ and friends -- protecting the Earth from the Darknaughts who prowl the Channels of Infinity!: John Witchthorn uses his mystic powers and supernormal abilities to protect the Earth from extra-dimensional danger!
Unshelved - archive
Fallen - updates Sundays

Fantasy

SkyFallManga.com || SkyFall Online Manga
Fantasy Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Elves, Witches, Vikings and Beer!
Bookelves featuring Alfheim (alv'hame) Updated Tuesday, January 15, 2008: Fantasy-genre comics. Humor, romance, and adventure. Some mature themes, Benny Hill-style innuendo, and scantily-clad characters.
Dumb Luck
Sins - Updating MWF
Edge the Devilhunter Online: The Gospel of Whoopass!: An online graphic novel about a lewd, teenage gutterpunk conscripted by divine forces to fight the armies of hell. MA: Graphic Violence, Strong Sexuality, Adult Language
The Gods of ArrKelaan (Consequences - Prelude [Cover]): Drunk Duck is the webcomics community that provides FREE hosting and memberships to people who love to read or write comic books, or comic strips.
Exiern Thursday, June 7, 2007
Juathuur by Katie Sweet - Part of the SpiderForest.com Webcomics Network: Juathuur by Katie Sweet - Part of the SpiderForest.com Webcomics Network
..:: Heroes of Lesser Earth ::..: Heroes of Lesser Earth is a fantasy adventure on-going web comic series that has posts new comics on Tuesdays and Fridays of each week. Characters are RPG based
Looking For Group
-After Armageddon- Version 4.0 - Updates Mondays
Alpha Shade Pages
Cat Legend: Comics
Darken
Earthsong - by Lady Yates - Updates Mon&Thurs
Electric Manga
Errant Story
Fantasy Realms: An epic fantasy graphic novel by Clay Gardner and Niko Geyer.
Fresh Mode Webcomic Zone: Hunt
NNFB! Updates Mondays: No Need for Bushido, Samurai Ronin and Ninja!
Talismen - Return of the Exile
Seraph Inn
Shades of Grey
Tales Of Pylea
The Wandering Ones by day
The War of Winds, by KEZ. Hosted by SpiderForest!: A graphic novel that follows characters in the last battle of war that has lasted millennia. Updates 2x weekly.
toothycat.net - Looking for the Sun
http://crowfeathers.net/page.php?c=8&p=0
Valkyrie Yuuki
VOLG/English

general

Candi - Tuesday, July 6, 2004
Welcome to Fish Tank!
Odd-Fish Webcomic : Amore: Odd-fish webcomic by Biro-art's NobbyNobody
Emergency Exit- In your face!
star cross'd destiny - online illustrated novel - updates MWF: Epic saga of the five friends governed by the dark star of fate.
In the recesses of the archives...
The Off Chance - The Webcomic - Year Three: A comedic tale of a pair of room mates living their daily lives with a horde of rabid bunnies and a fish trying to rule the world.
Basic Instructions: How to Give Directions
Little Dee by Chris Baldwin
El Goonish Shive - Copyright & TM 2002-2007 Dan Shive
Flint Again
Friendly HOSTILITY
Funny Farm - Daily Comic Strip - © 2005 R. Smith
Factual Authentic Real True Stories
Giant In the Playground Games
Keenspace -- Nahast: Lands of Strife
Knights of Vesteria by Matt Summers and Tom Fraser
"Templar, Arizona" by Spike: Try to think of it as AN Arizona, not THE Arizona.
MARRY ME: A webcomic (online comic strip).
No Pink Ponies - Friday, March 3, 2006
Ozy and Millie
Paradox Lost
Penny and Aggie
PierceLogic: An online comic about games, computers, and the gaming industry as seen from the viewpoint of three gamers. Updated every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
Pseudome' Studio LLC: Van Von Hunter: Hunter of evil...stuff. Comic #220 11/26/06: Pseudome Studio presents the on-line manga, Van von Hunter. The mighty hunter and killer of all things evil, Van von Hunter, travels many an evil land, smiting many evil creatures and drinking many evil, magical beers.
Simulated Comic Product - How bad is it?
Something Like Life (): Drunk Duck is the webcomics community that provides FREE hosting and memberships to people who love to read or write comic books, or comic strips.
Todd and Penguin--archives: Comic strip about a cookie loving penguin who lives with a guy named Todd. My tribute to classics such as Calvin and Hobbes, Bloom County, and Peanuts.
Ugly Hill Archives: Ugly Hill
Yang Child

Sci Fi

angels2200.com
Buck Godot Online Comics: Girl Genius—a Gaslamp Fantasy with Adventure, Romance and Mad Science; read it now online!
Starsomething - Solar-Comics Every Astro-Monday
Good Ship Chronicles by Tauhid Bondia: Updates Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays
Experiences : Nine Planets Without Intelligent Life : Bohemian Drive
Star Traks BorgSpace 2.0 - The Assimilated Generation
Parallel Dementia Home
Banished: The Archives
Ice: the comic
Legostar Galactica version 3.0 - Friday, May 23, 2003
Indavo
Schlock Mercenary archives: Welcome to Schlock Mercenary archives, where you can find six years of the web's best comic space-opera all in one place
Special School by Andy Mason - Part of the SpiderForest.com Webcomics Network - Tuesdays and Fridays: Special School by Andy Mason - Part of the SpiderForest.com Webcomics Network
thefarreaches.com
Terinu
White Noise
Zap! Archives
STAR TRAKS: BOLDLY GONE...

haven't read them yet

The Best Webcomics of 2005

main


Aldus Maycombe :: Not-dead and fruitier than ever!
Amazoness!
AppleGeeks 3.0
Bruno the Bandit © 2001 Ian McDonald: Follow the daily adventures of Bruno the Bandit and his trusty sidekick, Fiona the microdragon!
Candi - Monday, March 5, 2007
College Roomies from Hell!!! for Monday, November 13, 2006: College Roomies from Hell!!! An online comic strip. If you thought college was hell, wait till you meet your roommates! This strip features three perfect strangers trying to live together without strangling each other, their cute neighbors, an evil hand puppet and a pet rock named Fluffy
Comedity 2.0
Dresden Codak - Absinthe Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
Evil Inc. by Brad Guigar - A Daily Webcomic
Fatebreaker
Flaky Pastry
Geek Tragedy Archives
Girl Genius Online Comics!: Girl Genius—a Gaslamp Fantasy with Adventure, Romance and Mad Science; read it now online!
Go For It! Archive
Grim Tales From Down Below, Updated Sundays: Comics based on movies, games, music, and pop culture. Also featuring the Power Puff Girl Doujinshi, Grim Tales From Down Below, TIN: The Incompetent Ninja, and the King of Fighters Doujinshi.
Krakow Original. Same Great Taste. Same Great Webcomic. Thursday, September 07, 2006
Lizzy
Misfile - A comic by Chris Hazelton - Now Updating Every Weekday
Mystican Dreams: A war between races on the planet Mystica. Will a beautiful princess and a servant from two different races be able to end the 1000 year rift?
No Reason » Archive » Heroes: A webcomic (online comic strip).
Nuklear Power - Home of 8-bit Theater
Parallel Dementia Home
Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday
Real Life - The Online Comic
Shanime.com: Home of the webcomics 'The Peons,' 'Pigeon,' and Hero +/-'
something positive: archive
something positive: archive1937
Sorcery 101
SPQR Blues - Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Strange Candy archives: FOOM! The lives of six strangers change forever when they're transported from Tokyo Tower to a Strange world of cat boys, cat girls, amazons, shoujo manga, jello wrestling, love hotels, giant robots, tentacle monsters, bishounen waiters, cutthroat croquet, and idol singers.

Welcome To Gun Baby
Wireheads -- Hollywood Blondes, Visual Effects Blues & CGI Geeks!
Menage a 3

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Forum Basics

"Hi dunno if this is the right place but i thought i just ask do you have a forum for fanfic please tell me i want to read some that would be awsume thanks"

"Hey where can I get the game discs for <this'n'that game> I, uh, lost my originals. Yeah, that's it."

"Hi im new hear cud u plz sent me sum picz of my faverite actor i lik him so varry much OMG tis si so cul!11!!!1!!! "

"omg d00d you're site t0tally suckz u r teh stupidest pers0n on this planet lol"

Recognize some of these? Quite probably, since these are, like, one third of all forum posts in the entire internet. And since I'm fed up with these repeat offenders spamming and creating unnecessary traffic, I'll try an education effort.

Note: No, I am not ranting about my dear friends at the Charmed Sons or TwoP, I do browse other forums, too, you know? I'm just ranting about idiots on the internet in general. Lord knows there's enough of'em.

Lesson 1 - The Golden Rule

Confuzius said it, Jesus said it, Muhammad said it, it's in the Torah and the Mahabharata, and quite frankly, it's the base of common sense in social interaction. If everyone would apply it, George W. Bush, Mahmud Ahmadinejad, and Kim Jong Il could proclaim World Peace in a press conference the very next day.

Treat the others like you want to be treated yourself.

Deep shit, dude. Also, it's not that hard to apply. And if you apply it, then Eeeebony aaaand Iiiiivory live together in peeerfect haaaaarmony....don't worry, I'll stop singing now.

Lesson 2 - The Basic Idea of Interpunction

sometimes sentences end that's just the way it is there's no reason to worry though because the internet doesn't have a I only take one sentence post function if you read up until this part you probably might have noticed that it's kinda hard to follow the text because it's not always perfectly obvious where one sentence ended and where the next one begins so if you'd just start using those commas and points on your keyboard I would really appreciate that thanks

Lssn 3 - Typg cmplt wrdz wl n/kill teh net. Or ur keyb.

Rly. T wn't. U no?

Lassen 4 - Now ur lengridge.

Did you know that "they're", "their" and "there" have completely different meanings in the English language? Astounding, isn't it. Even more astounding is the fact that two thirds of the people reaching the forums from the United States are apparently completely unaware of this phenomenon. I'd make a Dubya crack here, but: Nah.
The point is, no one expects you speak flawless English. I'm a non-native-speaker myself, and I'm still having trouble with those stupid prepositions sometimes. But you could at least try. If I could understand the difference between "your" and "you're" as a ten-year-old, I am confident you can do the same. I have faith.

LESSON 5 - COULD YOU PLEASE TURN DOWN YOUR STEREO?

TYPING LIKE THIS IS REALLY NOT APPRECIATED. WANNA KNOW WHY? IT IS THE NET EQUIVALENT OF SCREAMING. AND WE'RE NOT DEAF. AT LEAST, WE WEREN'T UNTIL YOU SHOWED UP.

Lesson 6 - Hey! Look! I can totally change the fonts 'n color 'n shit!

Hey! Look! I will totally ignore you now because not only did you make your post completely unreadable, you also exhibited the maturity of the average six-year-old! And everyone else will ignore you, as well!

Lesson 7 - Google is not out to kill your firstborn.

One of the most important lessons, ever. About 90 per cent of useless questions could be avoided if people just relied on search engines instead of annoying others. You don't like Google because it collects important data about you? Well, get used to the program, and since you're most likely from That Country With That Patriot Act, Google finding out what you wanted to buy on Ebay is really, really the least of your problems with freedom.
Or, even better, you use Altavista, Yahoo, the MS fucking N search engine or one of the bazillion others.

Lesson 8 - know thy surroundings.

Imagine it like this. Instead of the swinger's club you are aquainted with, you accidentally stumble into the nearest book club. Imagine the others surprised looks when you casually take off your pants and start rubbing your body against the nearest girl or guy. After that, things most certainly get awkward. And people tend to call the police.

See? So if you want to talk about your homoerotic fantasies, www.ihatefags.com is probably the wrong place. Likewise, no one wants to hear your faszinating theories regarding Warcraft strategy if you're posting it in a forum dedicated to the mating habits of the several species of Pelicanidae in South America.

Hint: You don't have to boast into every forum you possibly find, only the ones you're interested in.

Lesson 9 - Please do not feed the troll.

You're in a forum dedicated to, say, the incredibly interesting hobby of collecting paperclips. (Dear people of paperclips.com - Don't judge me.) Suddenly, some newbie uses his very first post to barge in on your discussion with the startling fact that paperclips collections cause your penis to shrink and everybody affiliated with that hobby is actually a child molester. In response, do you:

a) Rebutt that idiot by telling him his momma is a total whore, because she, like, slept with your neighbours poodle the other day
b) Try to reason with the confused individual, patiently explaining in excruciating detail the joys of your paperclip hobby, rallying your friends to defend the paperclipper's honour
c) Run instantly to the moderator, screaming bloody murder and insist the offender's account is to be vaporized immediately, annoying the crap out of the poor soul who moderates your board in his/her freetime for no compensation at all
d) Simply fail to rise to the bait, causing the Troll to starve, wither, and die, and we all live happily ever after.

Lesson 10 - No, I really have cancer this time. Really.

Generic Forum. The poster having the moniker "SeemsLikeANiceGirl" posts in a new thread: "I just returned from my doctor. He said I have cancer in the last stage. I have only six months to live."
Naturally, the thread soon is full of well-wishes, "oh-you-poor-girl" and the like. If you monitor it more closely however, the more senior forum members, and the admins, refrain from posting in that thread. Surely they just haven't seen it, or are too busy, you say. No one is so heartless as not to react to that.
If you follow up the next weeks, there are no further posts by SeemsLikeANiceGirl. Nothing relating how the symptoms progress, how she's coping, if she's even still alive, nothing. Absurdidly, forum life goes on, no one even seems to care. Why this? There's a poor soul suffering somewhere!
Fast forward a few months later. A forum poster called SeemsLikeANiceGirl posts: "I just had a call from my doctor. She says I have Leucemia and I have only one year to live."

What happened? Easy. That's a troll, too. They come in quite some variants: "My dog got run over by a car." - "I have the AIDS. (of course, by blood transfusion after a horrible accident)." - "My brother-in-law works on the set of VeryFamousTelevisionShow and I have been behind the scenes several times now. I know all the insider scoop." - "I live in the Center of a war zone and my life is constantly in danger." - "I am the neighbor of Angela Merkel and I know what underwear she wears. "(eww) - "I am dying of syphilis, and also, my daughter just got hit by a bus." - "I once saved three orphans from drowning, and nobody thanked me." - "I am in talks with producers of NotYetProducedTelevisionShow, and am confident we will be on FOX in the Fall season with the virtual season I am writing".

Yeah. Riiiiight. As with the more obvious variety of trolls: Starve them.

Lesson 11 - Just because Daddy pays your Internet provider, doesn't mean everything on the Internet is free.

Yeah, of course you did just lose your cd. And your codebook. And your manual. And while we're at it, your extremely legal collection of mp3's.
But either you suck it up and buy the damn game, or acquire the necessary H3xx0r sk1llz to steal it from some shady site. But don't annoy the posters who just want to chill out talking about their games.

N00b.

Lesson 12 - Häy A Grrrrl Letz cyber !!1!1!!!1

Look, I know. You're male, you're a geek, and your expertise of the female anatomy consists of that cartoon I saw the other day, where Sailor Mercury is flashing her boobs and seductively waving with a dildo, telling me I can <japanese symbol> her <japanese symbol> if I only pay 699 Yen per <japanese symbol>(Err. Hint: clicking on random links in a language you don't understand can be REALLY hazardous for your mental health sometimes. 'Nuff said.)
Where was I? Oh, yeah.
But comments like those in the title don't make it exactly easy for the non-nerd faction (of both genders) to consider you mature enough to warrant a continued conversation, instead of a well-deserved "Fuck off and die."

Lesson 13 - We're about as interested in your genital warts as everyone else is.

No, seriously. No, seriously. No, don't post pictures. Please. And remember that sometimes your internet friends can be as grossed out by you as your real-life friends are. Go find the appropriate forum if you want to talk about it. (And since I just found out that buttfuck dot com is a real internet address, I'm quite sure there's an appropriate forum for your more... special... needs, too.)

Lesson 14 - Now if only I could figure out how to click this link...

I find it amazing sometimes. There are people out there who, while not really figuring out how to operate their opposable thumbs, are somehow able to log into this newfangled "Interweb" and - you guessed it - annoy. Here's a particularly good example:

I have a little webspace at my uni where I have uploaded some uni scripts and cheat-cheets, just so people don't have to search as long to find them as I had to. One day, I receive an email with the following sentence in it:

"Well, I would have gotten some of your files, but there wasn't a download anywhere." -

The "download" was a link which you click, and the download starts. I assumed some of my links were broken, and asked him back which downloads he tried. None, because there are none, he replied. After some back-and-forth I realized: This guy didn't try to click my links because I didn't label them with "Download" or "Download now!", but the actual file name, and he thought if he clicked them he would simply leave the site. Please also bear in mind this guy is going the same university as I do. So, he's kind of part of the so-called intellectual elite of this country.

I can never guess if guys like him are simple stoned up the wazoo, are so plain stupid they probably receive their Darwin Awards in the very near future, or if they are just screwing with my mind and pushing my buttons.

Some day in the future, I'll figure it out. And then I'll probably weep for humanity.

Teshik's Blog

Monday, June 23, 2008

Fun for the Masses

Fantasy

general

Sci Fi

haven't read them yet

main

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Forum Basics

About Me

Blog Archive

Links

Labels